Authenticity: Why Is It So Tricky?

So here I am thinking about this topic of authenticity and how valuable it is to us as mature believers. I believe the Lord has some insights for us to receive an upgrade in our ability to be transparent, vulnerable, honest and essentially comfortable in our own skin. This in turn will enable us to loveone another better. Here are the notes:
Being Yourself Isn’t Easy
 After high school, I waitressed for a year, saved my money, and made plans to attend Bible College in a nearby city. Like a typical teenager, I was nervous about meeting new people. I really wanted to make a good impression. There was only one problem. I didn’t really know who I was and as a  result, I acted differently in different settings. I was a comedian in some circles, a rebel among others, a fashionista, a scholar, an intercessor and a flirt, just to name a few.  The net result was anxiety and exhaustion. My coping response was to take lots of naps. “Who am I right now, anyway?” The other factor that is worth mentioning is that I was crippled by my proneness to compare myself with other people. Not good.
Similarly, in the Old Testament, we see that Saul spends his whole life comparing himself to other people. When he initially meets Samuel, he’s looking for his donkeys, and Samuel greets him, saying, “And to whom is all the desire of Israel turned? Is it not you?” referring to Saul’s being God’s choice for king of Israel (1 Sam 9:20 NIV) Basically, Saul responds, “Who? Me? You talkin’ to me?” as he looks over both shoulders and points to his own chest. “Why do you want me? I am from the least tribe, I am the least in my family, and my clan is weakest” (see 1 Sam 9:21).
Initially, you might see his humility as virtuous, but the truth is, Saul never sees himself as being God’s man, being God’s choice. What’s worse, he doesn’t allow anything or anyone, even Samuel, to change his thinking. He is so performance-based that he refuses to accept the endorsement of Samuel, God’s prophet.
God empowers Saul anyway to do lots of cool exploits. God empowers him to prophesy. God anoints him in battle. Still, Saul hides when the people go to proclaim him king. As a grown man he hides behind the luggage. Later, we see that his improper understanding of his identity rears its head again. This time, instead of feeling unworthy to be used of God, Saul decides that his accomplishments entitle him to defy God’s order concerning who makes the sacrifice (should have been Samuel the prophet.) Saul cannot walk in godly confidence or godly obedience because he cares more about how people see him than what God says. Ultimately, Saul is most well known for how threatened he was by the anointing on David's life. Instead of paternal approval, he's eaten by jealousy..so sad.
We, on the other hand, have the marvelous privilege of being born on this side of the cross. Jesus made all the difference in the world when came to live an obedient life, submit to the cross and then to rise from the dead by the power of the resurrection. Then he sent the Holy Spirit to live in us. We not only have new life, we are also free to be our authentic unique selves, the life God ordained for us.
 "Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you’ll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you.” Col. 3:3-4 The Message


Unlike Saul, we can live in the understanding that we are much loved sons and daughters. We can derive our identity and our confidence from know that our righteousness is a gift that was purchased on the cross for us and the truth that the Holy Spirit is teaching us and making us holy. He’s looking for our ‘yes.’ He’s not looking for perfection.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, 4even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love 5he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, 6to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.” Eph. 1:3-6

As I look back on my 18 year old self, I wish I knew then:
I am accepted in the beloved (with all my immaturities and flaws).
I don’t need to be afraid, dreading or anxious.
I don’t need to be jealous, envious or threatened.
I don’t need to be ashamed or regretful. 
I don’t to escape or complain.
​

The Holy Spirit is teaching and convicting us…little by little as we are in prayer and in his Word. He is maturing us. My only prayer is that I would desire him more. Then, he can take my natural gifting and add his anointing. He made each of us unique. He likes it that way. He accepts us. He likes who we are and he intentionally made us different from one another.
The net result is that we get deeper trust, increased faith and profound rest. Ultimately, we become the best version of ourselves and the authenticity we long for turns out to be a synonym for abiding in Christ. That’s good news!
Hopefully, this was helpful. Let me know your thoughts. Feel free to share this with your friends and family!

Love, Bonny